Cutting Corners

Boston Here We Come

[d1noli @ Saturday, April 23, 2005]

So another work week has passed! Finally.

Words cannot express my elation over not having to be at the office tomorrow through Monday. The stress of the merger is reaching a fever pitch with it beginning to hit closer and closer to home. This week many good people I knew were sent packing. It was so unnerving to see all these folks walking out, carrying boxes filled with stuff from their emptied desks. It won't be long before the decision about me will be made as well.

The morale where I am is downright tragic. People don't want to work. They sit in their little cubicles just waiting to hear what awaits them. Can they really be blamed? I would be doing the same thing if I didn't have so much else to worry about. As much as I want to do the same, I continue to help others that need me. Pathetic really. But then, that's just my nature and what really keeps me going on.

But it is becoming really difficult. Last Wednesday I found out that my Director is no longer above me. Fortunately for her, she is moving on to a different position. Three of her other counterparts weren't as lucky. And I found out about this coming into an unannounced meeting of all things! Just imagine me coming in late for a meeting and being greeted to this room filled with everyone in training. My heart about stopped! But what really got to me was the news. Since my director was leaving, my chances for job security have become less sure.

What ever happened to one gaining dignity from work? Back in college, I actually spent a whole hour learning this concept in Theology class. I was taught to view work as a means for one to achieve true humanization. It was through this act of labor that one found the self becuase, in working, one could strive to become better. This was, therefore, supposed to be a gift from God because the drive for excellence is exactly what makes us human. Now, as I watch all these people being sent home, distraught and defeated, these lessons of past make me feel like a fool. The reality before me does not show work as an act of humanization. Rather, work demeans one's dignity. All these people who have given their loyalty and time to this company have been fired. They are unfairly sent home with nothing more than shame, definitely less than what they used to be before.

Boston will be welcome break. I do not know if it will be pleasant given the circumstances (which will be hovering over my head like a dark cloud) but it is most definitely needed. As someone told me, I need to live life. Whilst I can't control all the things in it, I surely can take hold of the aspects that I can. In the end, the only thing that determines my unhappiness is myself.

Hopefully, Boston will help regain some of my lost dignity and confidence. Being among friends who actually care about me will help. Maybe I can seek temporary refuge within their caring hearts, be energized by the sincerity found there. It surely will be a million times better than the cold, empty halls filling up my workplace. Ironic isn't it? Here I am about to go to a place so well known for it's frigid weather and stoic architecture, and it will hold much more welcoming warmth than where I working am now. What a sad truth.

All I can say is: Boston, here we come...

The Beauty of Travel

[d1noli @ Friday, April 08, 2005]

Okay, I will admit it. I miss being a trainer for my company. As much as I've bitched and complained about that job, I did like it.

Well actually, that's not completely true. What I really do miss is the travelling from state to state part. Ironic, isn't it, given the fact that I am deathly afraid of going by plane? Still, being a trainer allowed me to visit states I had never been to before, ones I would have not cared to see otherwise. My travels opened my eyes to the inherent beauty of the places I visited. I learned to appreciate the diversity and culture of that which surrounded me. (Plus, it did keep me actively moving around rather than being stuck behind a computer all day!)

Nowadays, being a training manager instead of a trainer itself does not require me to do much travelling. So, when the opportunity to observe one of the events I had helped develop came up, I immediately jumped at it. Sure, this would require me to work on the weekend but, heck, it still wasn't something I was going to pass up. I would, once again, get the chance to visit the world that I live in. And that would make it all worth it.

My assigned destination: Pittsburgh.

I had actually travelled to Pittsburgh before for work. One of my co-trainers back then had a life event happen that prevented her from meeting obligations (aka. she quit due to an unexpected pregnancy). So in lieu of her situation, I volunteered to cover her area. Having never been to this place before, I thought it would be good a time as any to see what this state had to offer.

For the life of me, there was nothing much I could remember from this previous visit except for the fact that it rained a lot. Unfortunately, the weather was not that much different when I arrived this go round. And actually, it was rain AND snow this time which made the plan ride into this state sooo much more fun. Someone had to pry my saggy butt loose from the seat after we had landed!

After checking into my hotel, I spent the rest of my day conducting store visits with my vendor rep-slash-trainer. Despite the rain and snow, this turned out to be quite a joyful experience overall. By going around town, I was able to see a lot of Pittsburgh for the very first time. (It's just too bad that it was so dreary outside to take any pictures.)

And you know what? I never realized that Pittsburgh was such a mountainous state! It was simply breathtaking to see all the infrastructure literally built into these huge masses of land. Even though I had driven through them on my last trip here, I was so awestruck at the tunnels going through these mountains. It literally felt like I was seeing all this for the first time. Also, the buildings seemed to be such a part of the natural surroundings --- a perfect blend of Mother Earth and human craftsmanship. It was almost like they were these large mushrooms sprouting from the ground itself. It was just amazing!

Experiences like these are exactly what make me miss my former life as a trainer. I think all my travelling back then allowed me to expand my horizons and become more accepting of the differences around me. By interacting with these various surroundings and people, I learned to see how things are basically the same yet different at the same time. A person is a person no matter what. A building is a building no matter where. It is this very symbiosis between the foreign and the familiar that makes life interesting and ultimately brings forth appreciation. And in this appreciation, tolerance and respect is built.

I've always believed that many of the small-minded bigots out there would benefit from travelling more often. If they were able to realize the simple truth of how places and people are essentially the same yet different, I think a lot of the hatred out there would disappear. There's so much more in the world to appreciate rather than be disgusted with. All it takes it an open heart and a trip to the unknown. That's the beauty of travel.